Zhang Mingyuan immediately set Su Jinxue down.
Su Jinxue's face was as red as a steaming bubble teapot.
“Damn it! This damn Heavenly Dao, I really want to beat him to death!” Zhang Mingyuan gnashed his teeth.
Yet, the Heavenly Dao had absolutely no situational awareness. Spotting the two of them by the cliff's edge, he wobbled over and threw an arm around Zhang Mingyuan's shoulder.
“Worthy Brother, why aren't you drinking to your heart's content? Or do you just not know how to drink?”
The Heavenly Dao reeked of alcohol, thoroughly drunk.
Just then, Lingxuzi and Bai Lumian drifted down upon the wind.
Bai Lumian wore an emerald-green flowing immortal gown, her sleeves fluttering in the wind, looking exceptionally ethereal.
As for Lingxuzi...
His once spotlessly white robe was now reduced to charred, tattered rags.
His entire face was so pitch-black he could rival an African tribal chief from Blue Star, and his dark hair was blown out into a spiky sea urchin shape.
Seeing the usually meticulous, gentlemanly Lingxuzi reduced to this state, Zhang Mingyuan couldn't help but burst out laughing.
“Hahaha! Old Dog Ling, you've really been blackened like a dog this time!”
After laughing his fill, Zhang Mingyuan turned to Bai Lumian. “What happened to him?”
Bai Lumian let out a helpless sigh. “Isn't it obvious? He got drunk and went on a rampage in the square. He claimed the disciples were all geniuses, and that he was the heavens!”
“Wait, Big Brother is a personification of the laws of the universe. How could he get drunk?”
Bai Lumian didn't say anything, only pointing at the Heavenly Dao. “Why don't you sense him again?”
Hearing this, Zhang Mingyuan focused his divine sense to investigate.
“Holy crap... When did he get a real physical body?!”
Upon hearing this, the Heavenly Dao waved his hand grandly and let out a smug, drunken burp.
“Hic~ Naturally, it was when I was drinking and tasting tea at your estate earlier!”
“This Dao felt that drinking in a body of laws was completely tasteless, so I personally molded this physical body. It's no different from an ordinary human!”
“Of course, except for that...”
At this point, the Heavenly Dao suddenly looked down at his crotch, muttering to himself, “Huh, wait... Should I make one for myself too?”
“Hic~ Actually, forget it... This Dao is the Heavenly Dao itself. No one in this world is worthy of me!”
Listening to this, dark lines practically trailed down Zhang Mingyuan's forehead.
Disgusted, he pushed his unreliable big brother away, letting him stumble blindly in the snow.
He looked back at Bai Lumian. “So he went on a drunken rampage claiming to be the heavens. Then what? What does that have to do with Lingxuzi getting struck by lightning?”
The corner of Bai Lumian's mouth twitched violently.
“After he claimed to be 'the heavens,' the disciples teased him, saying that our Lord Husband's big brother was just a drunkard talking nonsense.”
“Then, to prove he really was the heavens, he summoned the Nine Heavens Divine Lightning on the spot...”
“How could the disciples and elders present possibly withstand such a heavenly tribulation?”
“In the end, Lingxuzi stepped forward and took the brunt of it all, ending up in this charred state...”
Hearing the whole story, Zhang Mingyuan's face darkened completely.
Was this damn Heavenly Dao trying to blow up his Yunxue Immortal Territory?!
“Hey! Let me tell you, Worthy Brother!”
The Heavenly Dao suddenly sprang back to life, leaning in once more to lock his arm tightly around Zhang Mingyuan's shoulder, describing the scene with great animation:
“Back then, your disciples all thought your big brother was just trying to act cool! They thought I was some nobody!”
“But as your big brother, how could I possibly be a small fry?!”
“So I immediately summoned the Nine Heavens Divine Lightning! Boom, boom, boom! Crackle, crackle, crackle!”
“Instantly, dark clouds blotted out the sky, and lightning raged through the air! A terrifying pressure descended from the nine heavens!”
“And guess what?”
“Those disciples who mocked me were instantly scared shitless! They cried and begged for this granddaddy to quickly call off his divine power!”
“Hahaha, it was so satisfying!”
The Heavenly Dao grew more and more excited as he spoke, gesticulating wildly.
“As expected of your Blue Star novel plots! Doing this 'cosplay' is absolutely fantastic!”
“What was this kind of plot called again... Ah, right! Flexing and face-slapping! Hehehe, awesome!”
Bai Lumian listened with utter confusion, asking, “Blue Star? What is that?”
Lingxuzi opened his mouth to puff out a cloud of black smoke, explaining with a scent of lightning, “It's Zhang Mingyuan's hometown.”
“Zhang Mingyuan's hometown?”
Bai Lumian was taken aback. Then, a look of realization dawned on her pretty face. “Oh! Zhang Mingyuan, so you're actually an 'extraterrestrial demon'!”
“How is it? Is your hometown fun?”
“Can you take us there for a look too? You can't just take your big brother!”
Hearing Bai Lumian's words, Su Jinxue could no longer remain calm.
She had never expected that Zhang Mingyuan would actually take the Heavenly Dao to Blue Star, when even she, his lawfully wedded wife, had never been there...
But when Zhang Mingyuan heard this, he stood frozen on the spot as if struck by lightning.
Blue Star?
He certainly didn't remember ever taking the Heavenly Dao there.
How did He know about all this?
Could He have snuck over there on His own?
But that didn't make sense either!
Over five thousand years had passed in the cultivation world. Was Blue Star still popularizing 'flexing and face-slapping' novels now?!
!!!
A thought suddenly exploded in his mind.
He remembered the Heavenly Dao telling him before to go back and visit Blue Star when he had the time.
Could it be...
“Holy crap! Big Brother, do you know something?! Tell me quickly!”
Zhang Mingyuan spun around abruptly, his hands gripping the Heavenly Dao's shoulders tightly. The expression on his face was even more exaggerated than if he had seen a ghost.
He was excited, ecstatic, thrilled, and so hyped he felt like he was about to fly!
Seeing Zhang Mingyuan's frenzied state—looking as though he wanted nothing more than to hug the Heavenly Dao and kiss him—everyone was utterly dumbfounded.
What was going on???
Even Su Jinxue watched in a daze.
Even after their marriage, Zhang Mingyuan had never looked at her with such intense, passionate eyes...
The Heavenly Dao was shaken into a daze. “Worthy Brother, why are you so excited?”
“I told you a long time ago to go back and visit Blue Star when you have the time. It's really fun over there!”
“Ever since you and my sister-in-law left the Heavenly Dao space last time, I went back over there for another stroll.”
“Although the people there can't cultivate and spend their time tinkering with something called 'technology'...”
“...at least everyone can live in peace without worrying that some powerhouses fighting might shock them to death with a random aftershock—”
“Hey, hey, hey! You know that's not what I'm asking!!! Give me the main point! The time! What year is it on Blue Star right now!!!”
Zhang Mingyuan directly cut off the Heavenly Dao's rambling, shaking his shoulders with all his might.
To his surprise, with such violent shaking, the Heavenly Dao's stomach churned. With a sudden retch, he spewed a colorful heap of pixelated vomit onto the ground.
Instantly, countless spiritual plants were stimulated by it, sprouting rapidly from the snow.
After throwing up, the Heavenly Dao's legs suddenly kicked straight out, and he passed out.
“Holy crap! Why did you pass out now?! Can't you finish your sentence, hey!”
Zhang Mingyuan stamped his feet in frustration.
He simply stopped asking. Since the guy had passed out, he would verify it himself!
He spun around abruptly, grabbing Su Jinxue's hand. With his other hand, he formed a sword hand-seal and sliced open the void, beginning to frantically locate the spatial coordinates of Blue Star!
“Little Xuexue, hold on tight! Your husband is taking you to see my hometown right now!”
Rate on N.U.
