Bai Lumian stared at Lingxuzi.
She was the grand Valley Master of Spring-Return Valley, unparalleled in both medicine and poison, and the ultimate, peerless love guru of the Xuanling Realm.
If she were to be outdone today by a half-baked fellow like Zhang Mingyuan, where would she put her face?
Theory had to be combined with practice!
Mimicking Su Jinxue, she extended two fair, slender fingers, a faint layer of azure spiritual energy circulating at her fingertips.
The spiritual energy formed a thin membrane, perfectly sealing in the juices of the Western Desert spiritual melon.
“Open your mouth.”
Lingxuzi was currently holding the purple clay teapot, preparing to take a sip of tea.
Hearing this, he froze completely in place.
He looked at the emerald-green piece of melon held to his lips, then at Bai Lumian's face, which was right in front of him.
Her pale skin shimmered slightly under the sunlight, to the point where he could even see the fine peach fuzz on her face.
For five thousand years, aside from discussing arrays and medical theories, the two had never had such close contact.
“What... what are you doing?”
“This Valley Master told you to eat, so eat!”
With a poke of her finger, Bai Lumian stuffed the piece of melon directly into Lingxuzi's mouth.
Lingxuzi instinctively chewed a couple of times.
The sweet, refreshing melon juice dissolved in his mouth, tasting unspeakably delicious.
Bai Lumian turned her head to look at Zhang Mingyuan and raised her chin.
“How is it? Is it delicious?”
These words were addressed to Lingxuzi, but her gaze was a provocation directed at Zhang Mingyuan.
“It... it's delicious.”
Bai Lumian let out a proud, cold snort.
“See that? It's just feeding someone a piece of melon. What's the big deal?”
“It's not like anyone else can't do it. Zhang Mingyuan, you'd better stop acting so smug.”
Zhang Mingyuan leaned against Su Jinxue's shoulder, watching the two opposite him as the corners of his mouth curled up wildly.
He reached down and slapped his thigh, laughing so hard he rocked back and forth.
“Old Xu, your expression is all wrong.”
Zhang Mingyuan pointed at Lingxuzi.
“She's feeding you a piece of melon, yet you're breaking out in a cold sweat and your whole body is stiff!”
“Anyone who didn't know better would think Lumian fed you some Heart-Severing Powder!”
“Look at your hand! You poured tea all over your crotch!”
“Hahahahaha!!!” (Ultimate Invincible Manly Mockery.jpg)
Lingxuzi looked down, and indeed, the purple clay teapot had tilted, wetting a large patch of his pants.
“Holy crap!”
He hurriedly put down the teapot, taking a long moment to regain his composure.
He looked back at Bai Lumian and scratched his head.
“Wait, Lumian.”
“Old Zhang and Immortal Lord Su are Dao companions recognized by the Heavenly Dao. Them feeding each other is just couple's playfulness.”
“The two of us are completely innocent. You suddenly feeding me melon, what's that supposed to mean?”
The courtyard instantly fell silent.
The wind blew past the Yin-Yang Luan-Phoenix Immortal Grass, making a rustling sound.
The smugness on Bai Lumian's face froze.
On her pale cheeks, a blush spread at a speed visible to the naked eye, instantly turning even the tips of her ears red.
She had been so focused on competing with Zhang Mingyuan just now that she had completely forgotten about this!
The master of love theory, who had been single since birth for five thousand years, now had a completely blank mind.
Theory was theory, but how did actual practice turn out like this?
“You...” Bai Lumian pointed at Lingxuzi, her finger trembling.
“What about me?”
Lingxuzi scratched his head again.
“Did I say something wrong?”
“Men and women should maintain proper distance. This action of yours could easily cause a misunderstanding.”
“If word gets out and ruins your reputation, Lumian, I won't be able to bear the responsibility.”
“Besides, your spiritual energy was wrapping that melon. It tasted like medicine to me!”
“Ah!!! You big idiot!”
Bai Lumian raised a foot and kicked Lingxuzi's shin.
Lingxuzi winced in pain, hopping around as he clutched his leg.
“Are you being reasonable? I'm just speaking the truth, and you actually hit me? You are simply unreasonable!”
Bai Lumian ignored him completely, turning her back to everyone and covering her burning cheeks with both hands.
She wished she could immediately perform an escape technique and flee back to Spring-Return Valley.
Embarrassing, so embarrassing!
“Oh my, ‘The two of us are completely innocent. You feeding me melon, what's that supposed to mean~’”
Zhang Mingyuan pinched his throat, mimicking Lingxuzi's tone to perfection.
Then, he switched to a high-pitched, squeaky voice: “‘You big idiot!’”
Su Jinxue sat nearby, watching Zhang Mingyuan fool around, a very faint smile playing at the corners of her lips.
She picked up her teacup, took a sip, and calmly delivered a final blow: “Lumian, cough... theory is, after all, just theory.”
“Zhang Mingyuan! Su Jinxue! Shut up!”
Bai Lumian turned her head, glaring fiercely at the husband and wife.
“Old Zhang, if you keep being so sarcastic, believe it or not, I'll rip your mouth open!”
Lingxuzi was also infuriated, pulling out his white jade fly-whisk.
“Come on, let's hurt each other!”
Zhang Mingyuan stood up, hands on his hips, his face full of arrogance.
“Are single dogs not even allowed to be talked about? If you have the ability, why don't you two go get a Heavenly Marriage as well and show me!”
The atmosphere in the courtyard grew lively once again.
Lingxuzi: “Old Zhang, I! #$%...%#@$%&@$%&”
Bai Lumian: “Exactly! Zhang Mingyuan, you... %*$$@&%$@...”
Zhang Mingyuan: “Heh, is that it? No lethality whatsoever. Let me tell you, you guys are just %...$%&@$...!#$..., two single $#@...!#$... who only know how to @!#%@#$%...&$@%&...”
Zhang Mingyuan fired off words like a machine gun, retorting until the two of them were utterly exasperated.
Refusing to be outdone, the two of them fired back at Zhang Mingyuan together.
On the side, Su Jinxue shook her head helplessly at this scene.
Honestly... there was just no helping this bunch of idiots.
The courtyard was peaceful, the wind rustling through the flowers and grass, the aroma of tea lingering in the air, and the melons sweet and refreshing.
The four mighty figures standing at the absolute peak of the Xuanling Realm were currently like the most ordinary of friends in the mortal world, bickering, laughing, and bantering.
In this supreme immortal territory that countless cultivators in the Xuanling Realm would fight to the death to enter, a sense of earthly, everyday warmth and liveliness actually emerged.
However, right at this moment.
The sky changed.
The sky above the originally clear Yunxue Immortal Territory darkened without any warning.
The entire sky was covered by thunderclouds.
Electric snakes rolled, and silver lightning danced wildly.
The spiritual energy of the entire Yunxue Immortal Territory instantly froze.
On the outskirts of the immortal territory, countless disciples who were cultivating raised their heads to the sky in terror as the defensive array let out a wail.
The laughter and bickering in the courtyard ground to a sudden halt.
Lingxuzi's expression changed abruptly.
Taking a step forward, he shielded Bai Lumian behind him.
The white jade fly-whisk in his hand emitted spatial fluctuations, forming an invisible barrier that protected them both.
Bai Lumian instinctively grabbed Lingxuzi's sleeve, her amber pupils shrinking.
This aura was too terrifying.
It surpassed the Mahayana Stage, and even surpassed the level of a Red Dust Immortal.
It was an absolute will that stood above all living beings, looking down upon eternity.
Looking up at the sky, obscure and profound chains of laws could be seen faintly weaving and crisscrossing.
With every flash, the surrounding space warped violently.
“What's going on, Old Zhang? Where did you offend such a terrifying existence?”
Lingxuzi said in a deep voice, cold sweat dripping from his forehead.
Bai Lumian stared intently at the sky. A Poison Dao Domain quietly unfolded from her sleeve. Thousands of invisible poison runes drifted through the void, waiting only for a thought from her to completely seal off all life in this realm.
Right at this moment, a voice echoed from the extremely oppressive thunderclouds.
The voice was majestic and grand, shaking heaven and earth:
“Well, well! You guys are having quite a grand old time here! And you didn't even think to invite this Dao!”
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